September 27, 2012

Keith Hernandez Has Done the Unthinkable

Earlier this month, New York Mets broadcaster Keith Hernandez made waves when he announced that he was planning on losing his signature lip sweater.

As you can imagine, word of the potential massacre was not well received among the mustached community.

"Keith Hernandez removing his lower nose foliage is a crime against nature akin to the Washington Monument ceasing to be phallic or Todd Akin being sane," American Mustache Institute Executive Director Dr. Aaron Perlut said.

Well, it happened.

And, yes, by "it"...I'm referring to Hernandez making good on his threat.  On Thursday, dude was publicly shaved in front of Citi Field to the delight of those on hand and in the name of charity.

"I want to thank all of my fans who supported my mustache over the years," Hernandez told the crowd of hundreds, "but it's time for it to take a back seat and let my upper lip some time to shine."

And while it might all be fun and games for the former National League MVP, his 2007 title of "Greatest Sports Mustache of All-Time" now hangs in the balance.

“His title will either be given to runner-up Rollie Fingers, an athlete and role model who has never turned his back on the Mustache American community, or we Keith’s actions may necessitate revisiting the voting effort altogether,” according to AMI chairman Dr. Aaron Perlut. “We are deeply disappointed in Hernandez and feel we have to take this action.”

However all this shakes out, here's hoping the Miami Marlins step in and offer the shorn 'stache a one day contract.


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